On January 3rd Ben and I will have been married for 13 years and will have been together for over 14 years. We’re so comfortable with each other, and work so well together, we live and move through our lives without thinking a lot about our relationship. But, over the past couple of days, I’ve been thinking about it. For the hell of it I came up with this list of 13 things I LOVE about him. By the way, I really recommend doing this. It’s super therapeutic and reminds you how fabulous your person is and always has been.

1.) He’s timelessly, ruggedly handsome. (This means he’ll be attractive until he dies!) His eyes are beautiful, thoughtful, and can dance effortlessly between anger and joy. (This is how it all started.)

2.) He’s an exceptionally good kisser! This may sound shallow. But, when you first meet someone you don’t have a lot to go off of. Something like being a superb kisser can easily carry a new relationship to the next level.

3.) He possesses the ability to teach. He is able to explain difficult concepts in ways they make sense to average people (like me). (This is how we first got together. He tutored me in Calculus.)

4.) He’s a brilliant writer. He’s written two memoirs. His first, I could not put down! I read it in less than 24 hours!

5.) He’s passionate. Whether he’s helping a student with an algebra problem, getting his gear ready to go on an elk hunt, wrapping his hands to box in our basement GYM, wrestling with our five year old on the living room floor, writing a paper for school, or in a deep life conversation with me he’s ALL IN. He understands the importance and lasting consequence of focusing on life’s critical moments. And, he’s aware that even the smallest moments can end up being the most meaningful and therefore, critical.

6.) He’s a musician. He plays guitar and piano. Music plays a daily role in our lives because of him. He made sure Sam received a solid foundation in music by insisting on piano lessons early on. We only had an electronic keyboard in our tiny apartment at the time. But, Ben made it work. Sam is an excellent musician now!

7.) One of my favorite things to do in life is to have any conversation with Ben.

8.) He has an excellent memory! He remembers moments that were important to him during his childhood. He uses those memories as a catalyst to make sure our kids have the opportunities to make their own awesome memories.

9.) He’s happy with who I am. He’ll read this and love it. But, if there’s a grammatical error he’ll let me know. (He’d never let me walk around with my zipper down!)

10.) He’s happy with who he is. But he’s also a dreamer and a doer. He moves in one direction only, and it’s forward.

11.) He makes an effort to love the things I love and he only encourages me. Knowing Ben has made me a better person. Because of him I’m in love with working out, I’ve completed a marathon, I finally completed a BS degree, I know how to shoot a gun, I know how to hunt, and I know almost all the lyrics to every single Eagles song ever written!

12.) Ben is surprisingly strong and super athletic. I wasn’t aware of this until after we were married. We were moving into a 2nd floor apartment and had a washer and dryer to move up. When it came to getting the washer up the stairs he opened the top of it up, stuck his hand in it to get a grip, grabbed the bottom of it with his other hand and literally bounded up the stairs with it! I mean, I would have married him anyway but it was/is kind of sexy. This past summer he ran his first 40 mile ultra-marathon!

13.) Ben is the most intelligent person I know. He’s completed two undergraduate degrees, a master’s degree, and will no-doubt finish a PhD. His education is a testament to his staying power. It’s contributed to his well roundedness as a person and to his actual knowledge base. And certainly his education plays a part in his intelligence. But the main vein intelligence I’m talking about is how Ben is able to communicate with, relate to, and understand other people (and his willingness and desire to do so).

So that’s it. Here’s to another 13 years! I LOVE YOU!!!